The Benefits of Being Ugly

I'm not sure if its nature or if it's society but women have been conditioned to thrive on their looks. To put it crudely, beautiful women get ahead in life because they're beautiful. Men fall in lust/love with beautiful women while other women are intimidated by beautiful women and so tend to give the beautiful ones the room to get ahead. Physical beauty for a woman is everything. Just look at Hollywood, that bastion of modern culture. How many really "Ugly" or even just "Plane" women have been allowed to succeed on the silver screen? By contrast, you have actors like Jack Black who have made a fortune by playing ordinary, unsexy looking guys. 

So, I guess we have to say that ugly women are destined to fail in life unless they're gifted with extra genious talents in other areas. Margaret Thatcher was no beauty but her sheer force of personality got things moving. Then again, Mrs Thatcher is pretty much a unique case.

Then again, for those of you who have been following this blog will know, a woman can get away with being downright ugly and at times stupid. Yes, its the presence of Flesh Ball aka Zen - Singapore's least attractive prostitute. Zen is what you'd call one of life's perpetual misfits. When it comes to describing looks - the nicest thing you can say about her is that she looks "Unusual." Her body is "fleshy" and she most definately does not wear an S size. Yet if you look closely, you'll find the world's tinnest hands, feet, eyes and nose attached to an overgrown body. When I showed her picture to my mother, the only reply I got was,"Darling, I hope you're not seeing her socially, it's too ugly to bear - she's SO FAT you can't see her eyes." 

Having said all of that, Zen is exceedingly confident to the point of being cocky. How did that happen? The answer is two fold. One she's obviously found customers who find her looks sexually appealing. The other is she's turned her lack of looks into a sales technique on suckers like me. I'm not about to seek her professional services but when she looks pathetic enough, it actually makes me feel lousy not to do things like buy her a drink or a meal and I'm obviously not the only sucker for a fat baby like creature in distress. A close friend of mine decided that, "She's my favourite charity." 

What do lack of looks imply in this case? I suppose its a sense of ...you can't let her die. You look at Zen with her lack of looks trying to eek out a miserable existence in a disgusting profession and you find yourself cheering her on. As a Negative Chinaman once said,"Considering the disadvantages she has, it's a miracle she hasn't killed herself." I mean Baby Cute is not what you want to be when you're 26 but if people feel sorry and are moved to do things for you, it's an asset. The girl is incidentally also benefiting from being less than a nobody (education level - N or NO Level) in as much as she's happily worked as a nude model and media guest - discussing life as a prostitute.

I think of Zen and her lack of basically everything because of a 43-year old single mother who has entered by my life in recent months. We're at the "Just Met" stage and she's already managed to stir up a few interesting reactions from some of my friends who have met her. 

This girl has had it rough. Her ex-husband is a cad of the highest order. He's devoted a great deal energy and time into ensuring that she's jumping through hoops to collect what little child support he gives her for their two children. Going through the court system is no fun, unless you're him. This man once earned on average of S$20,000 a month but has since claimed bankruptcy and is making the most of his "Legal Aid" lawyers to make his ex-wife sweat. 

Having said that, the girl has a history with men that makes you afraid that she may be attracted to you because if you look what she's ended up with, her possible attraction to you may be an inditment of your moral fibre. This is, in not so many words....bagage. Having her around is having her bagage and the word's "High Maintainance" come to mind. 

Two views about her situation have surfaced. One gentleman says it so simply - "How can a good looking an articulate woman not be able to build a life for herself?" A lady says,"Perhaps people will judge her less harshly if she looked ugly like a hawker, dressed like an ah so - cos it would mean her suffering is real." 

This is an interesting point. Zen who is everything a woman should not want to be elicits sympathy. My friend, who is physically attractive and socially skilled, does not. Are her sufferings and hardships less real that Zen's? Has being good looking hurt her chances of survival?