Summoning

 Towards the end of last year, I found myself talking about my marital status, when the person I was talking to asked “How come a guy of your caliber went for a Vietnamese girl and not an “Ang Moh” (Singapore slang for Caucasian) girl?”

While the person I was speaking to meant to compliment me (I wasn’t aware that I was a person of caliber), I remember this remark because it reflects a strange mentality that many of us in Asia have about having Westerners in your life is automatically a step up whilst have Asians from other parts of Asia is a step down.

I am aware that many of the Westerners who come to Asia often come in executive positions and I am aware that many of the Asians who do come to Singapore often come as domestic helpers, construction workers and yes, I am aware that many women from places like China, Vietnam and the Philippines do work as prostitutes.

However, just because one group work in nicer places than the other, it does not necessarily make that one group better. Sure, I may have a lot more in common with the lawyer and banker than I would with the construction worker, but I’ve found that the likes of lawyers and bankers aren’t necessarily better people than construction workers. They merely have more money. As the adage goes, the only difference between what goes on in Orchard Towers and Geylang is the clientele. The Westerners at Orchard Towers are merely paying more for beer and sex than the Bangladeshi, Thai, Indian and China workers at Geylang for the same thing. What makes one better than the other? I guess the answer is that one is has more money to pay for his vices.

If anything, dismissing people from third world countries as being a “step-down” is often a mistake. It assumes that you have a natural sense of superiority because you were born in a particular country or you went to a certain school.

If you take away all the arguments about good manners and decency, dismissing people from other parts of the world limits you in where you can go. Like it or not, the big markets of the future are inevitably in “third world” countries. China and India grab the headlines because of their vast size and geopolitical clout. However, they are not the only markets opening up. Here in Singapore, we have the wider ASEAN region and even Africa, long regarded as the basket case of global economics is becoming known as an “emerging market.” At the same time, the developed markets of the USA and EU are becoming more closed as politicians bend to protectionist pressures.

So, why do you want to automatically want to shut yourself of from people from the places that could give you future opportunities. It does not make sense

The second point is that people from third world countries have certain skills that make up for their “lack of education.” They are, for example, good at reading people. I remember a former colleague who ran into my wife. The former colleague told me “I know Vietnamese are only interested in money – I’ve done my research.” Funnily enough, the wife didn’t need to do her research. She told me – “That girl thinks you have a lot of money. She eyed up my ring.” Given my former colleague’s expectations when it comes to picking up the tab, I can’t say my wife is wrong.

The other thing area in which we lose out to is in the area of human connections. Yes, I am sure that I will be bombarded with complaints about why I am supporting people who “help their own kind.” But if you think about it, isn’t it the most natural thing to do in a foreign country to look out for people who are similar enough to you?

I’m not saying that migrant communities don’t have issues and their petty jealousies. However, by and large, they try to help each other out. The more established ones try to find jobs for new comers and help them out with the paper work that makes bureaucrats around the world salivate. Why do they do this? Firstly, they do so because they were once helped and then, there’s an understanding that the people you help will one day help you should you need it. I think of my good friend Porna who is now working as a chef in the Shangri-La. The man who is now Singaporean (National Service Completed) helps his friends from the Nepali community and in turn he’s never been out of work.

We seem to have lost this ability to network and help each other. Instead, we divide ourselves into entitled little cast. One of the best examples I can think of is a young little thing (Yes, Singapore Chinese Graduate) who after three months in a new job developed a habit of getting the boss’s PA to call people in the same office (which is a small office).

 

 Behaving like that probably works well in Rune Quest and other types of fantasy games. In the real world, you expose yourself as a person of low social status and you put people off wanting to deal with you. This is something that we as a small nation cannot afford to develop a knack for.