Who are you
attractive to? – An Evil Young Woman
The two women who played impacted my life in the last
three years seemed to be like two sides of the same coin. Both never met but
both said the same of each other. Both completed a wise saying.
First was the Neurotic Angel who liked to tell people,
“I know I am very attractive.” She first said this to me during our first
meeting, where I noticed that she had a strange talent for being as cute as a
twisted Pikachu which meant that she could say the most mundane of things that
made me melt like jelly and this was one of her key phrases.
The second is the Evil Young Woman, whom, when I told
her that I had been to a meeting where I met a woman who played with her hair
as we chatted, quipped “Attracted to you – must be crazy – all your women are
crazy.” Which led to the second part of the quip of “Who are you attractive to?”
I bring up these two ladies up because I’ve realized that
most of us focus on one key question. We worry if you are attractive, whether its
attractive to romantic, business or other sorts of partners.
Societies have a way of setting certain standards and just
about everyone tries very hard to meet said standards. If I take Singapore as
an example, women struggle very hard to look perfect in a Cheong Sam or a
Sarong Kabaya as depicted by the SQ Girl. The Singaporean man then struggles
very hard to work for a multinational or the government to show that he’s
attractive.
However, thanks to the internet, all of us are
attractive. A majority of us accept that we are at best, average in terms of
our attractiveness. Yet, there is a special minority that doesn’t content
itself with being average and moves to places where they’re considered
attractive – look at every white expat in Asia as an example. I still remember
one of my BFF’s asked “Wouldn’t you move to a place where being short, fat, bald
or all of it, was the criterion for the locals to throw themselves at you?”
I noticed it with one of my favourite tribes – cuddly girls.
One of the main characters in this tribe is Flesh Ball, whom all my guy friends
looked at and asked “What’s the opposite of an erection -we’re getting one
looking at her?” Well, not quite – I had one friend who looks like a Bollywood
actor who looked at her and asked “Who is she brother – she is chubby but VERY
pretty.”
This guy was at the time of meeting my friend, married
to a woman whom he descried as “a little bit fat.” The word “Little” was
understatement of the year and the fact that he was in lust with Flesh Ball
proved that his first wife was definitely not a one off.
So, not all of us like the same thing. I grew up on
Baywatch and so the ideal woman’s body was a generous chest, slender waist and
long legs. However, while I realise that my taste was relatively main stream, my
friend showed me that in his community, pretty was rather different.
So, just because someone isn’t appreciated in one
community, it doesn’t mean that they won’t be appreciated in another. As my
friend said “Wouldn’t you move to a place where being bald was a sex-signal?”
I look at the women around me and I believe its only
right for me to bring them to places where they’ll loved for being who they
are. When I had a diplomatic function, I brought someone who personified
elegance. When I had an African event, I got the Cuddly Tribe to come along. I
had to drag the Pillow to the event with the remarks “You’ll be VERY popular
here.” Flesh Ball thinks I am an a***hole but my point being – why shouldn’t I
bring the Pillow and the Cuddlies to places where they’ll be an instant hit.
All of us have a certain market, whether its ethnic or
religious or even based on the same hobby. It was, for example the Indian
nationals who gave me work when I was down. So, I learnt to eat briyani with my
hands. My only time doing government level work was with Saudi Arabia, so it
made sense for me to greet men from that part of the world with a kiss. My market
was pointing a certain way and so I adapted in that direction. Instead of
trying to fit into a mainstream that doesn’t appreciate you – look for one
where you’ll be a hit.
