As the French election draws to a close, I thought I would
drop a line on the topic of being with an older woman since there is a possibility
that the next “first lady” of France is significantly older than her husband. I
am, of course, talking about Emanuel Marcon, the current front runner who is
married to a woman 24-years his senior and the woman who has given him seven
step-grandchildren and the ripe old age of 39.
What’s interesting about this, is the fact that Mr. Marcon’s
marriage to an older woman is the fact that it’s been positioned against the marriage
of the 70-year old Mr. Trump to a much younger woman. Not even the most extreme
“Trump Haters” have questioned the marriage of a 70-year old man to a 46-year
old woman. Sure, there have been comments about Mrs. Trump’s propensity to plagiarize
speeches or to sue people ruining her chances on cashing in on being First
Lady, but nobody has questioned a woman marrying a man old enough to be her
father. Mr. Trump is actually somewhat respected for having a woman with a “hot-bod”
walking next to him in public. Having a significantly younger woman is probably
one of the better things Mr. Trump has done – most men overlook his record of
being a miserable failure of a husband because he’s snagged their “wank fantasy”
(cool – we like electing old farts who get young babes) and most women have an “understand”
Mrs. Trump for making an advantageous marriage.
By contrast, Mr. Marcon gets flack for marrying a woman
significantly older woman. His sexuality is being questioned and quite a few
people have wondered if he’s got a “mummy fixation” (would you trust a Mummy’s
boy to run the country?). The fact that Mr. Marcon has been a loyal husband
makes people question him even more. I think the person who summed it up best
is a Finnish friend of mine who suggested that Prince Charles had a screw lose
because “What type of man kicks out a beautiful blonde and replaces her with an
old hag.”
Perhaps its nature. Men are supposed to be providers and a
man is supposed to be at his most attractive when he’s at the peak of his
earning/hunting powers. A young boy of 17 may be physically fitter than a
30-year old but hey, he’s just a boy. By contrast, nature says women are
supposed to be fertile and nature is such that a 17-year old girl is fertile
and desirable whereas a woman in her late thirties is less so, even if the
30-year old woman is better educated, more mature and earns her own keep. My
late Uncle Richard went as far as to advise me, “Make sure your next wife is
half your age – no point having a girlfriend unless she’s very young and there’s
no such thing as a good-looking woman over 25.”
While I have come to accept that I may not be expressing
pedophilic tendencies every time I look at a woman 12-years younger than me, I
have a lot of sympathy for men who like older women. I was one of them and I
have to thank two ladies who touched my life.
One of them is around 12-years older. We met when I had came
back from England for military service. I
was 19 going on 20, while she was 32. The fact that she’s black was probably a
bonus (Chinese guys and black chicks is something that really happen in Asia).
The point is this, the relationship made me feel like I had something special
on the rest of the guys. I was 19 and there was this worldly-wise woman who
thought I had something special to offer the world and wasn’t afraid of letting
me know.
The other is someone I met when I came back from university
to serve an internship in Citibank Singapore. She’s 6-years older, Malaysian
Chinese girl. She’s a beauty of the highest order, sweet and mild mannered yet
strong. She’s worked most of her life and when she first approached me, I was
thrilled. It really felt good that she had an interest in me and I saw her
pretty much as everything a woman should be. My tag line with this particular
lady is this – she turned an old nightmare of “settling down” in an HDB flat
into a dream to work towards.
Neither relationship turned into anything concrete but I’m
glad to say that I’m still a friend to both ladies, even if it’s mainly on
Facebook.
Both of these ladies set a special tone for me. An older
woman was the way to go. Sure, a younger one might be fresher to look at but if
you’re looking at life-long commitment, you really want someone who will be
like a good bottle of wine and gets better with time.
It’s like this, a younger girl may look prettier and fresher
but young girls want to be adored. It’s easy to impress a young girl. Spend a
bit of money on her, show her you can resemble whatever fantasy she may have
and she’s yours.
An older woman on the other hand, is more willing to accept
you for who you actually are and somehow, when you have one in your life, you
get driven to do things. To get an older woman to be interested in you is also
more challenging because she’s been around. It’s easy for a woman to impress a
man as long as she’s got tits and not obese. It’s more challenging for a man to impress a
woman into talking relationship, especially when the woman has seen more of the
world.
Although I’m far away from my late teens and early thirties,
I still take this view. Getting a worldly-wise woman to give you two looks is a
challenge.
Hence, I hand it to Mr. Marcon. He met the Mrs. When she was
his teacher. He was a mere 15-year old boy and yet he managed to find something
to impress a decent looking woman, who had everything a woman could want. She
actually gave up her life to be with him (and that’s with parents warning her
to stay away until he was 18).
What I’ve said about an older woman having the ability to
drive a younger man is very true for the Marcons. Prior to running for
President, he was actually a minister and before that, he had a very successful
career at Rothschilds. He’s actually credited her as the reason for his
success.
By contrast, the Trump marriage is boringly obvious. When
the current Mrs. meet Mr., Trump had been an established brand name for
decades. The signs of luxury and luxurious living were all there. On his part,
she had a nice pair of tits. There’s nothing to suggest that either of them
have created something more an interesting than the old-fashioned trade off
that women have made for the last thousand years – financial security for their
bodies.
I used to be very proud that I would never have anything to
do with a younger woman and for quite a few years, I actually stuck to that.
I’m a little less adamant about my no younger women rule. I
was involved with an older woman who was a nightmare to hang around and
expensively boring. I’m married to a younger woman who is level headed and very
sharp.
Having said that, I still maintain that the best option is
to go for a woman who wants to make you a better man, despite her age. Perhaps
I’m the wrong person to give relationship advice but a man who can look beyond
what makes his loins stir and goes for the woman who makes him special, is
someone worthy of respect.