If You’re Not Fitting into the Mainstream – Embrace it.
I have a pretty screwed up work history. Back in the
days when I was in PR, I actually couldn’t hold a steady job on either the
agency or client side. I actually never worked in a single organization for
more than a year. My patchy work history was such that a mentor actually told
me that looking for a steady job was a waste to time because I’d never be able
to explain my short stints.
Then, when my things were running really dry in PR, I
got a job in the insolvency trade, where I’ve been with my employer for the
last decade. I have, however, remained an outlier in as much as just about
everyone is a lawyer or accountant and I’ve resisted joining one either of
these professions to justify my existence in the game.
Despite all of this, I’m not ashamed of how things
have turned out. Although I’ve never had the “respect” of my peers, I’ve had
the privilege of doing things nobody thought I had the right to do like
Government-to-Government (Visit of then Crown Prince Sultan to Singapore in
2006) work, events that drew several government ministers including a former
and current president (the IIM and IIT events in 2013 and 2012) and litigation PR.
So, although I would probably have been better off
financially, had I been more “conventional,” I’m quite happy with how things
worked out (even if I hate sitting in offices these days). For a start, I enjoy
not having the world view that my profession is the be-all and “end-all” of
things. In the years I’ve been working, I’ve had the privilege of befriending
the people you are obliged to call “Your Excellency” but at the same time also
making friends with people who are a step away from lock up. These are things
that have enriched me in ways that I would never have imaged.
I’m glad to say that being a misfit was not a lonely
journey. I had a few friends who encouraged me, even when everything I was doing
was “wrong” as far as standard careers went. Interestingly enough, one of the
first people who found me “interesting” is PN Balji, former editor-in-chief of
Today, who got me writing commentary for Today, which inevitably got me into
blogging.
Balji, an “old-school” newsman who had climbed the
ranks of the Singapore Press Holdings (SPH). Despite a stable career, he
proceeded to commit the ultimate sin in Singapore’s corporate culture of “divine
rights.” He joined a competitor and proceeded to build a newspaper that didn’t
belong to the only newspaper publisher. As such, his thinking was different
from the rest. Instead of treating contributors like he was doing them a favour
by publishing them – he actually encouraged ordinary folk to write and paid
them. So, while I never had a proper “journalism” job in any sense of the word –
I actually got published and published regularly.
However, whilst freelance wannabe writers like myself
appreciated him, the powers that be in the media thought rather differently. As
a Facebook post of his recalls:
Taken from the Facebook Page of Mr. PN Baji.
Having a patron who encouraged misfits wasn’t the only
thing. Along the way, I met a few other characters who would encourage me in
the journey of being a misfit. I think of Mark, the one-man operator law firm
who managed an international trial of one of Israel’s largest corporations. Mark
remains an interesting character who, instead of working his way up the
traditional law firm route, proceeded to set up on his own early on and took on
what one could call “rogue” cases (read helping drug offenders – or in
Singapore’s context, cases that are lost before they start). The man never
really become part of the lawyer cliques but preferred to spend time with the
SME owners who were his main support base. He encouraged me to do things, not
as part of a big group but as “little Tang Li.”
Another key cheerleader of misfit ways that I had the
honour of catching up with, is my former Recee officer, Chris, who graduated
from West Point Military Academy. The man gave up a very stable career in the
military for the path of “entrepreneurship,” without government support. In the
decade since he’s left the stability of the military, he’s gone out of his way
to help other misfits get on with their own thing:
Stranger’s Misfits.
In a way, being comfortable with being a misfit means
you get attracted to like minded people. Somehow, you get to see certain
talents gel together. I have the example of my Chubby Tiger partner, who as the
name implies, is as chubby as I am and confident about her love for food. The
chemistry is as this little African girl explains:
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/Zvil4hBuFD0
Being a misfit isn’t easy. It’s taken me nearly two
decades to be at ease with the fact that the “normal” path was out for me and
that I was best trying to make things work with other misfits.
Then again, its worth being at ease with being a
misfit. The alternative is inevitably worse. Its being a misfit but ashamed of
it and spending your whole life trying to get accepted by a system that won’t
accept you. I think of people who get consistently summoned by HR but yet stick
to their jobs because their identity is totally tied up to having a room and
being part of an organization. I think of ethnic minorities who are so desperate
to be part of the mainstream they will gladly sell out to try to be like the
majority.
Its sad because what they fail to see is that “not”
being part of the main stream is a strength. It allows you to see things that
people in the box won’t see. So, if you are misfit, work with it and play to
your strengths. Work with being different. It can only lead to real blessings.
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