The Misfits

 If You’re Not Fitting into the Mainstream – Embrace it.

I have a pretty screwed up work history. Back in the days when I was in PR, I actually couldn’t hold a steady job on either the agency or client side. I actually never worked in a single organization for more than a year. My patchy work history was such that a mentor actually told me that looking for a steady job was a waste to time because I’d never be able to explain my short stints.

Then, when my things were running really dry in PR, I got a job in the insolvency trade, where I’ve been with my employer for the last decade. I have, however, remained an outlier in as much as just about everyone is a lawyer or accountant and I’ve resisted joining one either of these professions to justify my existence in the game.

Despite all of this, I’m not ashamed of how things have turned out. Although I’ve never had the “respect” of my peers, I’ve had the privilege of doing things nobody thought I had the right to do like Government-to-Government (Visit of then Crown Prince Sultan to Singapore in 2006) work, events that drew several government ministers including a former and current president (the IIM and IIT events in 2013 and 2012) and litigation PR.

So, although I would probably have been better off financially, had I been more “conventional,” I’m quite happy with how things worked out (even if I hate sitting in offices these days). For a start, I enjoy not having the world view that my profession is the be-all and “end-all” of things. In the years I’ve been working, I’ve had the privilege of befriending the people you are obliged to call “Your Excellency” but at the same time also making friends with people who are a step away from lock up. These are things that have enriched me in ways that I would never have imaged.

I’m glad to say that being a misfit was not a lonely journey. I had a few friends who encouraged me, even when everything I was doing was “wrong” as far as standard careers went. Interestingly enough, one of the first people who found me “interesting” is PN Balji, former editor-in-chief of Today, who got me writing commentary for Today, which inevitably got me into blogging.

Balji, an “old-school” newsman who had climbed the ranks of the Singapore Press Holdings (SPH). Despite a stable career, he proceeded to commit the ultimate sin in Singapore’s corporate culture of “divine rights.” He joined a competitor and proceeded to build a newspaper that didn’t belong to the only newspaper publisher. As such, his thinking was different from the rest. Instead of treating contributors like he was doing them a favour by publishing them – he actually encouraged ordinary folk to write and paid them. So, while I never had a proper “journalism” job in any sense of the word – I actually got published and published regularly.

However, whilst freelance wannabe writers like myself appreciated him, the powers that be in the media thought rather differently. As a Facebook post of his recalls:

 

Taken from the Facebook Page of Mr. PN Baji.

Having a patron who encouraged misfits wasn’t the only thing. Along the way, I met a few other characters who would encourage me in the journey of being a misfit. I think of Mark, the one-man operator law firm who managed an international trial of one of Israel’s largest corporations. Mark remains an interesting character who, instead of working his way up the traditional law firm route, proceeded to set up on his own early on and took on what one could call “rogue” cases (read helping drug offenders – or in Singapore’s context, cases that are lost before they start). The man never really become part of the lawyer cliques but preferred to spend time with the SME owners who were his main support base. He encouraged me to do things, not as part of a big group but as “little Tang Li.”

Another key cheerleader of misfit ways that I had the honour of catching up with, is my former Recee officer, Chris, who graduated from West Point Military Academy. The man gave up a very stable career in the military for the path of “entrepreneurship,” without government support. In the decade since he’s left the stability of the military, he’s gone out of his way to help other misfits get on with their own thing:

 

Stranger’s Misfits.

In a way, being comfortable with being a misfit means you get attracted to like minded people. Somehow, you get to see certain talents gel together. I have the example of my Chubby Tiger partner, who as the name implies, is as chubby as I am and confident about her love for food. The chemistry is as this little African girl explains:

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/Zvil4hBuFD0

 

Being a misfit isn’t easy. It’s taken me nearly two decades to be at ease with the fact that the “normal” path was out for me and that I was best trying to make things work with other misfits.

Then again, its worth being at ease with being a misfit. The alternative is inevitably worse. Its being a misfit but ashamed of it and spending your whole life trying to get accepted by a system that won’t accept you. I think of people who get consistently summoned by HR but yet stick to their jobs because their identity is totally tied up to having a room and being part of an organization. I think of ethnic minorities who are so desperate to be part of the mainstream they will gladly sell out to try to be like the majority.

Its sad because what they fail to see is that “not” being part of the main stream is a strength. It allows you to see things that people in the box won’t see. So, if you are misfit, work with it and play to your strengths. Work with being different. It can only lead to real blessings.