Monday, March 05, 2018

Let’s Go Easy on Loudmouths


I’m going to do something very unusual – I’m going to be nice about the oaf occupying 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. I’m going to be nice about him because despite the crap coming out of his mouth, the guy merely a “talker” rather than a doer. As was brilliantly said in the classic series “Yes Minister,” – “Always deal with the difficult part in the headline.” In the oaf’s case, it’s a case of say it – say it even more loudly and if necessary put on a show of actually doing something but not actually doing it or doing it in such a way that the powers around you manage to stop you.

Take everything he said about China as an example. On the campaign trail, he couldn’t stop talking about how he was going to punish China for “raping the American Economy.” Once elected, he made a few noises and raised a tariff or two but the moment President Xi Jin Ping stood in front of him, the Donald was like an obedient school boy eager to please the Principle, even going as far as to bring out his granddaughter to sing for President Xi in Mandarin. A clip of Ms. Kushner speaking Mandarin can be found at:


I bring out the example of the Donald and his management style because life is filled with little Donald’s who believe that the way to be tough is to look like you’re tough. I’m not saying that these guys are duds. As is often said, they had to have done something right to get to a certain position in life. However, they are, more often than not, the type that only get so far because they can’t help themselves from living on bullshit and anyone with half a brain, a cool head and half a testicle quickly understands that this is often the easiest guy to deal with as long as you can live with the amateur theatrics.

Donald Trump is a wonderful example. In fairness, he actually had the brains to ensure he was born into a well to do family and somehow, he always made sure that Daddy was willing to bail him out whenever he got into the shit (It’s a skill – well to do Daddy’s didn’t get to where they were by being stupid and quite often they are hard on their own flesh and blood). The Donald eventually built a moderately successful business by bragging about how great he was (Seriously, who sues Forbes for ‘underestimating’ his wealth?). Somehow, some smart people bought into the hype and helped him move up without actually looking at what was behind the hype.

As much as I remain stunned that he actually got voted into the White House, I have to credit the Donald for doing something right to have tapped into something that compelled otherwise decent people to want to vote for him.

Having said everything that I’ve just said, there’s one fatal flaw to the man – there’s actually nothing beyond the hype. I think of the people who voted for him because they thought he was going to bring his business brilliance to running the country. Well, they’re partially right, he’s running the country exactly the way he ran his businesses – in a totally disorganized manner with no inclination of competence. In the year that this administration has been in power, they have only passed ONE bill despite controlling both houses of Congress and most of the governorships. He has bungled things that a mongrel could pass with flying colours (Denouncing Neo-Nazis) and his White House has lost staff faster than Usain Bolt on speed. This is the only administration that has gotten itself investigated within a year of being in office (By contrast, it took Bill Clinton 5-years for the Lewinsky scandal to come out and it was a similar time frame for Ronald Regan and the Iran-Contra Scandal).

You get away with being undisciplined in businesses because most businesses are small enough not to matter. The Trump Organisation is private organization that manages to be private enough for people to cover up the obvious holes. The White House is a different matter – your every move or your every failure is a matter of public knowledge.

The Donald, as they say, is only an example of a leader who got there by hype. As much as one should want leaders who are more deserving, these are perhaps the easiest characters to deal with. They usually have an obvious weakness – huge egos. Stroke their egos and they actually end up being quite easy to manipulate.

Once again, look at where Donald Trump has had the most success in his foreign policy. He’s managed to piss off traditional allies in the Western World who face similar public appearances that he does. Did he expect Emmanuelle Marcon to let him crush his hand for the television cameras? The French would not allow their President to be seen to be bullied by an American. Neither would the Germans allow Angela Merkel to look like Trump’s patsy. Even the British, who have traditionally toed the American line have actually cancelled a State Visit.

By contrast, Trump has done very well with the Saudi Royal Family. It should be noteworthy that his first trip overseas was to Saudi Arabia. Despite slamming President Obama for bowing to King Abdullah, the Donald actually curtsied for King Salman. A video link can be seen below:


It should be noted that the Saudi’s flattered the hell out of the Donald and reaped their rewards. The curtsey for King Salman was a very small price to pay for promising to buy billions of dollars-worth of American hardware. They saw it to it that Trump would be flattered at every moment he was in the Kingdom and the Donald loved every moment of it. A video of his tour to Saudi can be seen below:


Saudi Arabia flattered an ego in need of flattery. In return, the Saudi’s got him to curtsey before King Salman and more importantly, the Donald has come down hard on their Shia Rival across the Gulf, Iran and ignored their war in Yemen and he’s barely battered an eyelid over the blockade of Qatar. Despite coming into power on the promise to ban migration from Muslim countries, Saudi’s remain able to travel freely to the US of A.
The Chinese have also understood that flattery and appearing to kiss arse without actually coming near the proverbial behind works wonders. President Xi never seemed annoyed by the Donald’s comments on labeling China a currency manipulator. The Donald may blabber on about this and that, but the President remains calm and smiles politely:

The Chinese have made it a point of being very hospitable to the Donald. An example of the hospitality extended to the Donald can be seen at:



Somehow, the man who had it in for China and Chinese raping of the American Economy cannot help but gush over his Bromance with “President Xi.” Let’s put it this way, would you expect an American President to endorse the Chinese President lifting term limits and allowing himself to stay in power indefinitely?

Why have leaders from autocratic systems found it so much easier to get along and get what they want from the “Leader of the Free World,” than those from fellow democracies?

One could say that the Arabs and the Chinese have had centuries of learning the art of court intrigue, which the Europeans have not. Then again, that’s not quite true because European history is filled with double dealings – just ask any Pole about what happened when Adolf and Joseph screwed them up.

Perhaps it could be the fact that in a democracy, leaders have to appear to do what their subjects want. The British, French and Germans, expect their leaders to have some sort of public image that goes beyond money and power on the international stage. By contrast, a leader in autocracy merely needs to ensure that the subjects feel well taken care of not to rebel. Hence, King Salman and President Xi can tap into the Donald’s weak spots – namely money and power.

Which then leads to the next awful thought. Perhaps the Chinese and Saudi’s have something that makes the Donald think twice before doing anything stupid – namely the fate of the Trump Organisation. – Who is to say that King Salman didn’t politely hint to the Donald that there are Saudi Princes with money to spend on units in Trump Towers? Who is to say that President Xi didn’t suggest to the Donald that US policy might have unfortunate consequences on potential expansion plans in China. We will never know.

Loudmouths and braggarts can be exceedingly annoying. They can be painful to deal with, especially when they happen to be in positions of power over you.

However, if you understand what they want and if you have the ability to flatter on one hand, dangle a bribe on another and ensure that they understand that the hand currently stroking the testicles with tender loving care could turn into a vice like grip, then the loudmouth and braggart will find a way of giving you your long term objectives.  

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Maira Gall