How a Cute Boy turned into an Obese Middle Aged Man
Ended up clearing up the flat and in the process of
clearing up the flat, I ended up locating a photo of a time when I had hair,
wore glasses and considered being 75 kg an instant membership to Weight
Watchers. I was, if memory serves, 17 at the time and I turned this into a
TikTok video. A lady friend whom I sent this to replied, “That was a cute boy.
What happened to the cute boy?”
Well, the answer is that the said “cute boy,”
discovered that it was pretty easy to skip compulsory games lessons and since
the said “cute boy” had access to a credit card paid for by Daddy and there was
Waitrose nearby which sold Hagen Daz “Cookie Dough” ice cream, he’d spend his
time hiding in the dorm eating a tub a week instead of running around.
With the exception of two and a half years of National
Service and a few stints in remedial training, the said “cute boy” stopped cute
and slowly but very surely, he became, what his loving mother could only
describe as “Gross Looking.”
How did it happen? Well, I guess you could say that
the transformation started when the “cute boy” realized that he had a precious
commodity that very few “cute boys” had – Daddy’s credit card. So, instead of sticking
to school food (not that it was particularly great), he became the favourite of
the local Chinese restaurant. Add to that, there was cookie dough ice cream and
that was just on the calories in side of the equation.
It helped that “cute boy” did Karate on a regular
basis, which didn’t turn him into Bruce Lee but it was exercise and this was in
addition to regular games session, where he did play rugby and hockey at house
level. However, when the Karate Club closed down and he could avoid playing
games, the said “cute boy” realized that, well, exercise was something the
other sods did.
Whilst National Service stints did help maintain some “cuteness”
for a while, the said “cute boy” rather enjoyed his food and drink. Somehow, he
had the knack of finding himself invited to certain places where food was in
abundance. Beer was also good to have too. Exercise was limited to the odd
session of regular prancing in a club.
The eventually Middle-Aged Obese man believed that
sleeping was for wimps. Thought it was cool to stay up at night drinking and
then going for a meal (way past dinner) and then sleeping for a few hours before
repeating the process of eating more.
So, it goes without saying that “cute boy” become “uncute
man” and I guess you could say, it took a very fierce Vietnamese wife to push
him into taking his health seriously enough. Better eating habits and regular
walking helped reduce the obvious signs of obesity.
However, the killer for the now Obese Middle-Aged man
was a visit to the doctor and being told that his sugars at unhealthy levels.
The doctors offered a flurry of pills and so, the Middle-Aged Obese man realized
that regular exercise (daily walking as well as sprint session and push ups on
alternate nights) were no longer negotiable if he had any ideas of being
employable in his later years. There was a mother in the background telling him
“Won’t let you live off your siblings”
However, the most important part was enjoying having
that bit more energy just to do things that have kept the Obese Middle-Aged man
trying to test limits of physical endurance in his daily life.
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