Ending and Rebirth

 

The last few years of 2023 are ticking away and I’m due to work in the Bistrot on Telok Kurau, so I thought I would try and bash out a few thoughts of summarize the year that is going by and to express my hopes for the year to come.

In a way, 2023 was a brutal year. Thanks to the brutal attack on Israel on 7 October 2023 and the subsequently even more brutal Israeli reprisals on the Gaza strip, much of the world’s attention is focused on the brutality of that particular conflict and other conflicts that may arise. The chaos in the Middle East and Russia-Ukraine looks set to get worse by the fact that that 2024 is an election year in the USA and the world’s most powerful office is set to be a rematch of 2020, a contest between an elderly establishment candidate perpetuating the worst sins of the establishment onto the world and an unstable lunatic whose sole focus is to use the power of the office to cover his own personal weaknesses.

Since I joined the insolvency business, the turmoil on the global stage looks like a good Christmas present. Businesses around the globe are likely to be affected by the turmoil and many are likely to go under, which is good for insolvency practitioners around the world. Even the firm I’ve worked at for the last decade, which is a small player in the local Singapore market, has found its wings. In the past year, we’ve managed to set up our shop in Dubai and by the end of 2024, we are expecting to have a base in London.

So, whilst I have no great love for the industry that I am in, I’ve been able to enjoy certain benefits of the way the industry has moved. After many years of not traveling, I got to enjoy a trip to Jakarta and London for business purposes. I met people outside of Singapore and that can only help to keep my horizons normal.

On the personal front, Kiddo brought me to Hai Phong for a week and I believe this could be somewhere I may want to move to as I age. It’s not just the cheaper cost that make Vietnam attractive but the fact that there’s a sense of dynamism that is so sorely lacking in more developed places. Its one of those places where the poor don’t sit and beg or ask the government for handouts. They turn their little street holes into thriving enterprises.

The second personal trip was to head to back to the UK after 23-years for my sister’s wedding. I’m so happy I actually got to see the UK after so many years away and having my sister’s friends tell me “You were an important part of our childhood – what happened to you?” I am delighted that Tara has met someone she wants to spend the rest of her life with and I’m glad I had the chance to not only meet the new family but connect to relatives I haven’t seen for ages, specifically my stepdad, Lee who is 91, my stepsister Carol and her husband Sean as well as my Aunty Frieda and Uncle Adrian.

While my sister got married, I will officially be divorced next year. After 12-years together, Huong, the amazingly gorgeous Vietnamese woman I had the privilege of calling my wife, and I will go our separate ways. Her ambitions have taken her to the USA and I can no longer support her as her husband. As such, we dissolve our “life partnership” and move on. She will always have a special place in my heart and I like to think the same is true for her too and given that we’ve come back to each other so often, who knows where fate will take us.

Kiddo asked the simple question – “Will you still be my dad?” I’ve told her that the answer is always yes, but she’s now an adult and she has to find her own way and build her own life and I will be there when she needs me.

During the course of our separation, I’ve been asked if I would change anything. The answer remains no. Even if you were to take me back to the moment, I decided to marry her with everything I know now, I will always agree to get married. Our life together, good and bad made me a stronger person and my life would be poorer without those moments we had.

Another person who deserves mention is my intern, Mr. Jeff Yeoh, who came to work for us in July. At the age of 27, he told me he saw me as a “father-figure,” and I’ve found myself taking the trust he placed in me seriously. Its like this, when you have a little girl, the instincts are to try and protect. When you have someone of the same gender looking up to you, you actually need to show him or her what the future can be like. So, as I push 50 this year, I got to get it through his head that the future can be great if he steps out of his comfort zone and takes on the world on his terms.

The other person who had made life so much richer this year, is Ms. Genia Wee, my collaborator in the Chubby Tigers project. Genia is a tough and lovable cookie, who has a way of turning every meal you have with her into a joyful experience. She’s what Singapore needs – someone who is willing to discover the nooks and crannies of this little Island I have called home for the last two decades.

As always, I can only hope that 2024 will provide more adventures and opportunities to discover the world. I’m going to be 50 and its time I start discovering the unknown or the things that I never knew about the known world.